Dating during the teen years helps to promote healthy development among adolescents. Learning the skills of dating is also a time of social experimentation for them. Parents and teens may feel awkward or uncomfortable as they discuss the rules and expectations in this new situation but this should not keep parents from discussing sexual boundaries, curfews, and respect of their date. This time of development for the teen can be an opportunity to teach your adolescent how to date, have respect for each other and protect themselves from emotional and physical hurt.
Teen dating
A new study from the University of Texas was published in the June 2011 issue of Journal of Youth and Adolescence reports that teens who have a girlfriend or boyfriend are less likely to engage in delinquent or dangerous behaviors compared to teens without a partner. This was due to less time spent at parties where dangerous behaviors might occur. Teens in relationships also displayed more confidence, were self assured and less likely to subcome to peer pressure. The study also found family environmental factors, rather than intelligence were a more important influence on teenage sexual activity.
Parent guidelines
Dating during adolescence poses problems and challenges for personal growth. Understanding this impact can help parents dialogue openly about their concerns which will benefit families in this time of growth. Parents should be a good role model in their own relationships displaying how to compromise, advocate for yourself assertively but with respect to your partner. Parents should also try and meet the parents of the significant other to discuss dating guidelines and communicate often to make sure activities are supervised.
When the teen begins to date a parent should encourage double dating or going out with a group. The age difference should not be more than a couple of year’s difference between the two teens. This should help with the concern of being pressured into premature sexual activity. The U.S. Attorney General reports that 38% of date rape victims are girls between the age of 14 and 17. Discuss abstinence and how to say no or how to postpone sex. Educate and discuss the safe sex practices such as condoms and birth control. Practice having the teen state that “No” means no and that oral sex is sex. Parents should always look for warning signs of a change in behavior or appearance of their teen. This could mean that your teen is in compromising situation that would warrant a parent’s guidance. Keeping your teen safe even when they are resistant needs to remain a priority of parenting.
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