Understanding Male Depression

Men in our country have the cultural expectation of being in control or the “tough guy” when facing a crisis.  Expressing their emotions or feelings is considered more of a feminine trait.  Therefore men can be reluctant to express their concerns as they can see it as a threat to their masculinity.

Symptoms of male depression

The National Institute of Mental health reports that 6 million men and 12 million women are affected by depression each year.  While it may seem that males are less affected by depression they may be just undiagnosed due to repressing their symptoms.  Symptoms of male depression can include violent or abusive behavior, over involvement in work or sports, inappropriate rage and risky behaviors.  Men also have a tendency to mask their symptoms with alcohol or substance abuse.  Depression has been known to affect the male sexual desire and performance.  They also report physical symptoms of headaches, digestive problems and chronic pain. 

Ask for help

Untreated depression can lead to personal, family and financial difficulties.  Men will resist mental health treatment due to concerns with the stigma that it could damage their career or lose the respect of their family and friends.  If you know a male that is struggling with depression encourage him to seek treatment with a physician or mental health professional.  He may need support from medication management and to learn healthy coping skills in counseling to elevate his mood. There are many effective treatments for depression today so don’t think that you have to “tough” it out on your own. Choose today to get help and have a better quality of life.    

 

Stress, Anxiety and You

Our lifestyles today are packed with personal and professional deadlines. We can find ourselves overwhelmed with the “To Do” lists and racing against the clock to get the last project completed. Ruminating over these deadlines or obsessing about what needs to be completed can often lead to anxiety and depressive symptoms.

Schedule time for yourself

Taking care of yourself is essential to taking care of your family. If you are that Type A personality that is prone to obsessing you might want to try the following interventions to stop the ruminating.

1. Put on the music and dance, watch a comedy, call a friend, or clean the kitchen. Do a task that takes about 10 minutes. That is the minimum of time needed to break the cycle of thoughts.
2. Allow yourself 5 minutes to ponder the list you have to tackle and then move on with your plan of action.
3. Meditate for a minute by taking that cleansing breath, closing your eyes and just focus on your breathing.
4. Ask yourself what is the worst thing that can happen in this situation. Accept that and then move forward to cope.
5. Use your support system to let you know when you are out of control.
6. Accept that you are human and will make mistakes. Sometimes we are kinder to strangers than we are to ourselves.

Daily self-care 

Practicing these ideas to reduce your daily stress and anxiety can be very helpful in remaining emotionally balanced. Create a lifestyle for yourself and your family that prioritizes self-care with exercise, appropriate nutrition, and 8 hours of sleep. Always seek professional advice if your stress affects the quality of life you desire.

Are You Ready for Marriage?

How does a person know if they are ready to make that life commitment of marriage? Individuals are marrying at a later age hoping to avoid becoming a statistic of divorce which is hovering at 50 %. There are fewer couples today who can model their success on what makes a relationship successful.

Pre-marital counseling

Counseling is not just for people trying to cope with the problems in their life. It can be an intervention to prevent having discord in your relationship. Pre-marital counseling is one way to determine if you are prepared for one of the biggest decisions of your life. It can help you understand your partner’s perspective on a variety of topics. You can discuss the priorities in your life and where your relationship falls in that spectrum. This can confirm your sense of yourselves as a couple and if marriage is the right step for you. As a couple you need to discuss important topics such as religion, children, finances, habits, hobbies, and family issues among many other concerns.

Learn the skills of communication

Every marriage presents itself with difficulties and obstacles. Open communication will be what helps you through them. If you have difficulty talking through the issues in your lives, it would benefit you to learn how to discuss them while you’re engaged.

There are many options when seeking premarital counseling in every community. Your church pastor, marriage building workshops or any licensed marriage and family therapist can help you with this process. Invest the time in your relationship now as you begin to build your life together.