The death of a relationship, no matter how long it lasted,
is always intense and difficult. When you process the obstacles that were faced,
it is important that both parties accept their part in the discord that has led
to the separation. During this difficult time, it would be helpful to create a
support system that will provide you emotional support. Then allow yourself the
time to heal and grieve the loss. This process will help you to accept the
situation and in time visualize a new beginning.
Divorce
Society refers to divorce as a “failed marriage”. Many
marriages have ended emotionally prior to the filing of divorce paperwork.
These marriages weren’t failures if you are able to retain what was learned or
enjoyed from the relationship when it was healthy. In the course of life things
happen to people that cause them to change. Sometimes those events cause
relationships to end. That doesn’t mean the relationship failed when it was no
longer viable. The marriage was successful for the years the couple was happy
and together.
Move forward
Many couples facing divorce will concentrate on who to blame
for the cause of the divorce. It really doesn’t matter whose fault it is. You
are still facing the reality that the relationship is over and the question of
how you want to move forward. Obsessing about the loss and filling your life
with anger will only hinder your progress in healing. Focus on healing from the
experience and the new opportunities you can choose from. Your new life is a
work in progress.
Acknowledge that you need to heal from this experience
before seeking a new partner. The guideline is for every five years you are
with a partner it takes approximately six months of healing. Next find the
courage to be proactive and resolve to finalize the divorce. This will allow
you to accept that the relationship is over so that you can look forward to the
premise of a new beginning. Try seeking fulfillment in other ways by finding
employment that engages your skills and improves your marketability. This will
eventually improve your income and financial stability. Make time in your life
to experience new hobbies or the fun things that you like to do. Relish the
freedom that you now have over your own schedule. Focus on the positive and stay
healthy by eating right and exercising. Make this a part of your daily
lifestyle. The best option you have is to live well while enjoying life.
